Making Your Marriage Work After An Affair

Picking up the pieces and making your marriage work after an affair is not going to be easy by any stretch of the imagination. It will be much better for you if both parties are working together to make it happen though. This is one of those storms that your marriage simply is not going to weather unless both of you are willing to make it work.

What are some things you can do that will make it easier for both of you?

1.

Get marriage counseling as a couple. You may also want to consider counseling separately but there is something about your marriage that is not right if you or your spouse has had an affair. People who are getting everything they need at home have no reason whatsoever to cheat. There is nothing the other woman or man can offer that cannot be gotten at home. Counseling will help you get to the bottom of the problem and may even help you verbalize sticky topics within the relationship that you would not be likely to discuss otherwise.
2.

Talk to each other. Stony silences are not going to get you through these difficult times. This is a hard blow to any marriage but it's not unique to your marriage. The couples that survive are the ones that talk their way through the problem in order to find solutions that will work for both of them.
3.

Start over from the beginning. Don't try to go on as though nothing has happened. This will mean nothing changes and you'll be right back in this same situation again if you aren't very careful. Go back to the beginning and rediscover the thrill of seeing your husband or wife at the end of the work day. Rediscover the excitement of being together and actually learn to look forward to seeing each other at the end of the day. Think about it, if you're looking forward to seeing your wife or husband at the end of the day are you really going to give another woman (or man as the case may be) a second glance?
4.

Solve the problem. There is a problem in the relationship. Find out what it is and fix it. If you don't do this all the other efforts you make to turn your relationship around and save your marriage are really wasted efforts. Solving the problem will not only help you make your marriage work after an affair but it will also make your marriage stronger than ever before.
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